Saturday, October 16, 2010

October 16, 2010

Goodmorning.

The visit to the opthamologist was long. We showed up 15 min early for our appointment and then sat in the hall waiting for an hour an a half.

Dr.Lyons took us into his office and asked what our problem was. I told him of Anaya's condition and that we were wondering if she can see anything. I explained that she stopped making eye contact long ago.

He checked her pupillary response - nothing. Then he looked at her optic nerve. He looked into my eyes and said "I'm sorry, the degree of atrophy is very bad. It is unlikely that she can see anything."

I was expecting this but I was hoping for something more. My eyes teared up. I thanked him and left with Anaya. Walking through the hospital I cried. I was talking to myself - it's silly to cry now Camara - you already knew this! Why are you crying?

And we went home.

No word yet from Fed Ex. But two wonderful mamas from Langly BC sent milk on a greyhound bus yesterday. Thank you so much!!!

9 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry about Anaya's vision. It must have been hard to hear because it was "official," even if you already knew it. Thinking about you.

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  2. Anaya feels you and your love. Don't forget this.

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  3. Your SO welcome for the milk!! It was the least we could do for Anaya!

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  4. Thinking of you all Camara. Sending you lots of love your way!

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  5. Camara it's not silly to cry about it now. Hearing it from the opthamologist must have been hard. I know you've known Anaya can't see for a while now but it doesn't make it any easier to admit it. Let yourself feel, this is what I have always loved about you the most. And know that you have so many people around you that love and support you. You even have strangers that love and support you through this blog. You and Anaya are truly amazing and have blessed so many peoples lives. I miss you guys.

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  6. I am very sorry to hear about Anaya's vision. Know that she feels your love and hears the warmth and love in your voice. I hope that you take comfort in that. Thinking and praying for you always.

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  7. 'the essential is invisible to the eyes- we see only with the heart' the little prince

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  8. I know a fellow who used to have sight but no longer does. He says that even though his eyes no longer work he sees all the time. People's faces and places and objects are vivid for him.It takes so much more than the eyes to see. I know Anaya still sees all she knows and loves. You have given her life full of vivid love and luster. Know that her real self cannot be weakened by her condition and she knows love and knows her loved ones. Blessings on your family.

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  9. When Segev was 3 months old I took him to see a professor of pediatric opthalmology. She said Segev's optic nerve was in an advanced state of atrophy. This on top of his cortical blindness due to brain damage, but as you know from the blog Camara he started reacting to visual stimulus, just a little, a few months ago, after twelve years. Even if there is almost nothing active, keep thinking she can see something.

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:)